AOL is the Devil
In my studies in theology, I spend a lot of time thinking about heaven and hell. I ask questions like, "Who is God?" "Where do we all come from?" and "Where are we going?" One of the questions posed by theologians and non-theologians alike, however, centers around the topic of hell, or, namely, is there a hell? If so, what is hell like?I have concluded that if there is a hell (and I do believe there is) that one may gain a taste of what it is like in this life. Wanna know how? Well, if you want to know what hell is going to be like, I suggest that you try to cancel an AOL dial-up account, for trying to cancel an AOL account is a little taste of hell on earth.
I'm sure you all have read the accounts in the news lately. Who could forget poor Vincent Ferrari's recording of him wrestling with a pushy AOL rep on the phone? And lately we hear about AOL's refusal to cancel the account of a dead man. I mean, come on, the guy's dead for crying out loud! Give him a break already!
I too had my own experience with AOL several years ago. As a poor college student, I signed up with AOL after coming across one of their many infamous software CDs in the mail. I installed the software, got hooked up, and began to surf using their proprietary browser. It didn't take long for me to get annoyed with the whole thing, so I proceeded to go through the steps to cancel my account.
Well, the lady that I talked to on the telephone wasn't about to let me cancel. She asked me over and over again questions like, "Why do you want to cancel?" and "What about the service don't you like?" This went on for about 10 minutes until a shouting match ensued, which resulted in me not only finally getting my service cancelled but hung up on as well. My family, who overheard my half of the conversation, was stunned. Neither they, nor I, had ever heard of or gone through anything like that before.
That was about five years ago. I assumed mine was an isolated case, at least until recently as these kinds of stories are making headlines.
So what is the moral of the story? Well, for those of you pondering the mysteries of dial-up Internet accounts, I would say stay away from AOL dial-up; and for those of you pondering the mysteries of the afterlife, I would say that, yes, I do believe that the Devil is a scary little yellow man running around with a pointed tail and pitchfork.
posted by Sean Scribner at 7:31 PM
2 Backtalk:
A few years back, I got a postcard in the mail from AOL saying I needed to call and confirm my account. I called them up to ask if it was just a marketing ploy, or if somebody actually tried to sign up in my name, and to cancel my service if that was the case. They refused to tell me whether or not somebody signed up in my name, saying, "There's no way we can even know if you are who you say you are." They were, however, very willing and eager to sell me a subscription to their useless service, even though they apparently weren't even sure it was me.
I never figured out if the postcard was just to get me to call so they could sell me their garbage, or if the sociopathic girl I was living with at the time tried to sign up using my name.
Paulo,
I hear ya. I was talking to a friend of mine at work today, and he told me how he tried to cancel his AOL account a couple of years ago, and the lady told him she couldn't until he "checked his e-mails" and other things on his homepage. He insisted nothing was there since he never used any of that, but she refused, saying it was against their policy to close an account that still had unread e-mail in it. So my friend took down the lady's direct phone number and went to his account to clear out whatever was there. Guess what it was? His e-mail inbox had two e-mails......just sent to him......by the lady who refused to close his account!!! It's hard to believe that anybody would use such dirty, under-handed tactics like that, but with all the horror stories about AOL finally coming to light it's not so hard to imagine any more.
Thanks for your comment.
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